I know this isn't an especially difficult job. I can splice wires. I can make intentional holes in metal lathe plaster. I can patch and spackle. I know two homeowners that would totally DIY this from a YouTube video; they're a bit more experienced than Me but they're also a long way from pro's. It might be ugly, sure, but we're talking about a magical invisible piece of real estate behind the stove. As long as it doesn't cause electrical current to go where it shouldn't, I'm flexible on style points this time.
I called around and had some trouble finding an electrician who wanted this small job. Apparently all the sexy Licktricians are busy in August with big things like AC? Eventually I found one company who actually showed up yesterday, so I ducked out of work to meet them, and hopefully have the work done then and there.
I explained the job in clear and fairly informed terms. The guy then jumped in and told Me I needed a much bigger wire in order to accommodate the microwave over the stove.
"But I don't WANT a microwave over the stove. I never SAID anything about a microwave over the stove. And I am in fact vehemently OPPOSED to a microwave over the stove."
Oh. Well. He thought I would want that.
Nope. Like I said, I want you to wire this hood right here (points to hold already installed) thru the wall to that plug (points to existing plug). This job should take two, no more than three hours and I know the going rate is about $XX per hour. The materials are under $20. So what's your estimate?
Six hundred and seventy eight dollars.
Ex-queeze Me? That's THREE, almost FOUR times what My research says it should be in this market.
That's right little lady, right there ya got yer written estimate.
I'd be happy to have you get the work, but I need to understand this estimate. How many hours are you assuming and at what rate?
Oh, we don't do it like that. No sir. Cuz sometimes it takes longer and this way the price doesn't go up.
So this isn't an estimate, then, it's a fixed price quote with a built in safety factor for contingencies. I would prefer to work on a time and material basis. But I might be willing to work on a fixed price basis if I understood where this number came from. (I didn't say: cuz I suspect you pulled it out of your ass when you saw an unaccompanied female homeowner.) Do you have a corporate price list?
No.
So we danced in a circle for a while and I eventually I grew weary of the charade, bade them a good day, and kicked them out. What caught My eye through the whole thing was the way the non-talking 40s guy was looking at the bossy talking 60s guy. The non-verbal was distinctly smug, ha-ha, I told you it wouldn't work. And then toward the end it was more: heeheehee, now you're screwed, way to go, Pops.
It felt as if when I had pulled up in My car and they were still in the truck together, maybe the old salt had said to the young buck, something like, "hey, look at that. This is gonna be like shooting fish in a barrel, watch and learn my friend." And then he overplayed his hand, couldn't walk it back, and lost out on a legit job. I could hear the young guy ribbing him as they drove away... "Watch and learn, eh?" I have the distinct feeling somebody owes somebody a beer.
Meanwhile, back at the ranch, though I have struck a blow in self defense of Lady Homeowners, I really need this job done and I've now wasted a week on these yawbos. So I did something I stopped a while ago: I turned to a subby friend to solve a home crisis.
I know, I know. But hear Me out. He had already volunteeered to do the work, and was the basis of My negotiating position with the Licktricians (which, for the record, was consistent with another SWAG I had from a third source). So when I had to boot the yawbos, My choices were start from scratch; revert to the previous bunch of guys who had had to come out and fix a bunch of their mistakes under great protest (220v dryer outlet upside down, anyone?); or take the new guy up on his offer.
Now it must be said that I have learned some things since I bought a house and I no longer trust folks - even subbies - as readily as I once did. Losing three years of smartphone data will do that to a Master. So I asked mutual friends who work with him about his competence for the job. I took care to establish that he actually has the professional training one should have. And I considered that he has a longer professional history in engineery things, possesses the relevant equipment, and was generally consistently talking good sense about the project. And he was clearly *listening* to Me. I was comfortable he had the straight up electrical skills. What I didn't know about was the rest of it, and I knew I didn't know what I didn't know.
But the price was right and I needed it done. He really wanted to help and to build some trust with Me. I was pretty sure it was a safe calculated risk but also struggled with the fact I've been burned before. I spent a lot of time debating Never Again vs This Time Is Different. I was much troubled by the possibility of burning the house down. Or causing a gas leak. Or accidentally snipping through the fridge's thin water line.
But Necessity is the Mother of Questionable Decisionmaking so 24 hours later here we are. It took most of the day and it was a bumpier ride than either of us expected. Houses that pre-date modern building codes are wildly variable. One knows this intellectually, of course, but one can never predict how it might manifest This Time. Such a house will laugh at your assumption of studs 16" on center. They barely deign to notice that a standard junction box is 3/4" deeper than the gap they offer between brick and plaster. They defy the wan efforts of your 21st century fish tape tool. They absolutely insist on multiple Diva Trips to Home Depot.
But it is done and it works and nothing blew up or ruptured, and done is beautiful. The city codes inspector shall now visit and declare Victory! Meanwhile, I have a new friend, a new approach to fixing some things around the house, and we have done a moderately stressful thing together and come out still wanting to spend time together.
It was uncomfortable but it might just turn out to be a much better way to vet boys: Talk less and give them something challenging in vanilla space before getting to the kink... Hmmmm...
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